New year...New attitude...

Well, I don't do New Year resolutions, because I resent them. Instead I want to recall all the mistakes I have done in the past and one by one, I will analyze them.

I was chatting with my friend today, and we were talking about life in general. She's also a single mother. We used to work together when we were young, and we talked about what are the things we've learned in life.

I told her, I am a complete person now compared when we were still single. I do not regret whatever happened to me in the past. I do not feel sorry for myself why my marriage failed, cos I already accepted the fact that life sucks, and I am not the only person in this world, whose in the same situation as I am.

Life goes on...but one thing I have learned in life is to love myself above everything else. Ofcourse I love my kids, but I know someday, they'll find someone else, and they'll soon leave me.

I know I cannot foretell the future, but this time, I want to be realistic and a bit more prepared of all the possibilities.

LOVE- my friend asked me about this...Am I ready to fall inlove. Falling inlove is not about being ready. If it happens, it happens, you cannot control your feelings. But I said to her, I cannot possibly give someone that unconditional love. Cos that's what hurts me the most in my previous marriage. I gave my all without expecting anything in return, just a trusting marriage that's all. But i failed.

I am not cynical. I know someday, I' will find someone who'll open my heart. But as far as I am concerned, I am quite happy the way I am right now. I already accepted the fact that life is tough, now life doesnt bother me anymore, whether it sucks or not. And if anything good comes my way? I will just consider it as a bonus.

Hardship or problems are just part of our everyday life, without them, life is just sooo boring, cos you become comfortable and just stop fighting. You wont have goals anymore.
But...problems are solved only when we devote a great deal of attention to them and in a creative way...to have a good life, it is not enough to remove what is wrong with it. We also need a positive goal, otherwise why keep going? Creativity is one answer to that question: It provides one of the most exciting models for living.